Don't Be An Asshole

This post actually started as a Facebook status update, but got a little too long and then I remembered that I used to do this blog thingy so thought "why not put it there", so here I am again. And, wow, I can't believe so much time has passed since I last updated this thing...back a couple years ago when I actually thought I was busy I was able to post more, but now I kinda laugh at that because as my kids get older (I have a High Schooler now! EEK!) life has gotten exponentially busier. Sports practices are longer and more often, games and meets take us greater distances away, social activities are never ending...thankfully the High Schooler will be driving next year and, though the thought terrifies me, I really can't wait for him to drive his own butt to and from practices every night. Which brings me back to the reason I came over here to rant...OK, teach, you about how not to be an asshole while driving in winter weather.

 It's winter in PA, and like most winters I'm yearning for a tropical island and a nice boat drink...I guess one out of two isn't bad and I'll take the iced rumchatta for now, with one of those cute little umbrellas, please! And with winter in PA comes icy and snowy roads. If you're going to live here, you better know how to drive in it, especially if you're like me and live smack dab in the middle of nowhere, the land where plows are endangered species. Unfortunately it seems most people don't know how to drive in it, and even worse, drive like total idiots. So, I've developed a list of winter driving do's and don'ts I'll call "Don't be an Asshole."

1.  First off, if you're scared to drive in ice or snow, I have one word of advice for you--DON'T!!!  Scared drivers are not good drivers.  Unless you are a transplant surgeon who gets The Call that your patient's life saving organ is available and only you can save him, don't risk it.  Your kid will not die if he/she does not make it to practice.  You really don't need bread, milk, or eggs.  Even your boss would rather you stay alive, honest, and if not, what the Hell are you doing at that job anyway?  If you absolutely need to be somewhere, find a friend who does feel comfortable driving in bad weather to take you to your destination.  Better yet, find a friend to take you to an empty parking lot (schools are good if they're closed) to practice driving in snow--get used to how it feels to have your back wheels slide out and learn what to properly do when that happens (because guaranteed it WILL happen and the worst possible thing to do is panic!). And before someone points out the obvious "you have a Jeep, so of course you're fine"--a scared driver in a Jeep is just as dangerous as a scared driver in a Mazda Miata.  Just look at how many big ass SUV's are stuck in ditches next time it snows--don't be under the delusion that just because you drive a tank that has 4WD you will automatically be safe.  You won't be. 

2.  And if you have a big assed SUV 4WD, don't think you can just drive it around like the roads are dry.  Sure, it may get you through unplowed deeper snow, but it offers no advantage when it comes to stopping or turning, and no advantage on ice.  Please allow extra distance to stop at that stop sign or traffic light, otherwise you will find yourself t-boned into cross traffic.  This is especially true the larger/heavier your vehicle is.  Take turns slowly and controlled, and when you slide out a bit, don't, I said DON'T, slam on your brakes, just keep steering into your turn, easing off ever so slighty on the gas until you are headed straight. 

3.  I'll say it again, your brakes are your enemy in the snow and ice.  You want to try to drive slowly enough to avoid hitting the brakes.  Locking your tires removes your ability to steer your car.  Even cars with "antilock brakes" will skid out if you slam on the brakes in ice.  Downshift going down hills.  If you need to hit the brakes, do so gently, trying instead to control your car's speed via easing up on the gas pedal.  And if you are traveling at a reduced speed, this will not be difficult. 

4  Which brings me to my next point.  SLOW THE EF DOWN!!!!  'Nuff said.

5.  And when the car in front of you is going slower than you are, resist the temptation to tailgate.  Believe me, this will not make the driver of that car go faster.  It will make him/her scared (please refer to rule #1).  You do not want the driver of the car in front of you to be scared.  If he/she starts sliding and panics and slams on the brakes with you on his/her tail, guess what's gonna happen?  Yes, your front end will be in his/her back seat.  In bad weather, follow the most basic off-roading rule--leave lots of space between you and the car in front of you.  The worse the conditions, the more room you should leave.  The bigger and heavier your vehicle is, the more stopping time you are going to need if the car in front of you skids.  Nothing freaks me out more than a huge 18 wheeler riding my bumper in the snow.  BACK OFF ASSHOLE!!! 

6.  Lastly, just plain Don't be an Asshole.  And this is a rule to follow at ALL times on the road (and in life!).  Be courteous.  Don't cut people off.  Use your turn signals (I promise, you will not exhaust all your energy pumping that little lever on the steering column up and down).  Turn your lights on.  Put your phone down.  It's not a race, you don't have to beat all the other drivers to your destination.  You just need to GET to your destination.  And so do I.  Alive.

Mountain Pies...or how to entertain the family when snowed in!

So the NorthEast was hit with a huge snowstorm last night.  Fortunately, or unfortunately depending on how you look at it , here in PA we only got about an inch...not like my friends scattered across New England who are reporting up to 3 feet (personally I'm ready for 80 degree hit the beach weather, but if you love the white stuff, well, I guess I'll forgive you) .  This post is dedicated to them...especially the ones with kids who are reading this via cellphones because their power is out and OMG WE"RE BORED WHAT IS THERE TO DO WITHOUT THE XBOX PLAYSTATION TV IPAD BLAH BLAH BLAH HE LOOKED AT ME SHE TOUCHED ME MOOOOOMMMMM WE'RE BORED.  At least that's how it would sound like in my house...which would result in a shovel in each of the kids' hands and a swift boot out the door.  So, even though we're not in that boat, we still did a fun snowed-in/no electric sort of thing today for lunch--we made Mountain Pies in the fireplace!

What are Mountain Pies?  So glad you asked.  Well, first you need a fireplace or wood stove (or if you're brave this time of year, a firepit area outside cleared of snow).  Then you need a pie iron.  I would suggest if you're going to get a pie iron, you don't get the really thin metal ones they sell at discount stores.  I'm still all for pinching pennies, but in this case, it's really worth it to get the good/heavy cast iron ones like this one from campmor.com:  Rome Double Pie Iron - Cast Iron (Google Affiliate Ad).  I don't really remember when or who came up with the name "Mountain Pie" but I know it came about years ago during one of our many trips camping up in the Northern mountains of PA (I can't remember many of the details of those camping trips, but that's a whole different post).  We like to make our Mountain Pies with shredded cheese and pizza sauce, but really the sky's the limit--whatever fillings you want to put in them, go for it!    You could fancy it all up with brie, apples, and walnuts or something like that.  But then the kids would be all "GROSS", so here's the redneck, slummin' it, kid approved version:

So, if you have your fire, and you have your pie iron, all you need now is a few simple ingredients:
squeeze butter
bread
shredded cheese (we like mozzarella)
pizza sauce/pizza toppings

To assemble:
You'll want to warm the pie irons up over hot coals first so that your butter melts.  Push the burning wood to the side so that you have an area of hot coals where your pie iron will fit, close the iron, and put it on the coals for a couple minutes.  Be careful when you pull them out--they are VERY hot!!!  Open the hot irons and squirt a pretty liberal amount of squeeze butter onto each side (and before I go on, I must say sorry for the poor picture quality--I am not one of those fancy bloggers, if you don't like it go look at Martha Stewart's site.  Oh, and ignore the double pie iron under the one I'm using in these pictures.  Sorry Martha):

Next put a slice of bread onto each side of the pie iron on top of the melted butter.  Make sure you push the crusts of the bread down into it to fit:

Then, squirt some pizza sauce on one of the pieces of bread (not too much or the bread will get soggy) Try to get the sauce on the bread not the stone around your fireplace:

Spread the sauce evenly (you really don't have to do this if you don't want to, but if your kids are anything like mine, if you don't you'll hear "EWWWWW THE SAUCE IS ALL CLUMPY AND THERE'S NO SAUCE IN THIS LITTLE SECTION OVER HERE I'M NOT EATING THIS!!!):

 Once the sauce is spread, sprinkle the shredded cheese over the sauce:

Add any other toppings you want, then put the 2 pie iron sides together.  You'll want to make sure the side with just the piece of bread is on top and the one with the cheese stays flat while you're closing it, otherwise the cheese will fall out all over the place.  Place the pie irons directly on top of the hot coals:

Now, here's the tricky part--how long you cook them depends largely on how hot your coals are.  I usually will flip the pie iron over after about a minute or two, cooking both sides about 2 minutes (and make sure the little clasp thingy is clasped, otherwise it will open when you flip!).  Take out and check the progress at this point (remember, it's VERY hot!)

This one's not quite done, so close and clasp the iron and put it back on the coals, checking/flipping every minute or so--be warned, they burn very quickly!  Our dog Casey likes this step--he doesn't mind burnt Mountain Pies!  He also doesn't mind licking pizza sauce and shredded cheese off the stones!  When finally done separate the pie iron and flip the sandwich out onto a plate and enjoy!

Yes, you might correctly be thinking "well that just looks like a regular grilled cheese sandwich" and yes, yes it does.  But somehow everyone loves these...devours these...faster than they can be made.  Something about the fire and the snow outside just makes these something special...or maybe it's the distraction from all the electronics or the cessation of all the bickering among siblings.  Whatever it is, this is seriously something fun to do when snowed in (or even when pretending to be!!)

Long Time, No Write! (lame title, I know, but my brain is in cold medicine fog!)

So, if you followed my blog last Spring, you'll remember I wished for alien abduction (complete with the probing...what's the sense of a good alien abduction without the probing?) as an alternative to my jam-packed, no time to even sit and breathe, life.  Well, the aliens never came, but I suddenly today find myself sick with some sort of God-awful head cold that leaves me unable to move off the couch.  Forget my plans of an early zumba class followed by the Elverson Farmer's Market....my morning has been filled with boxes of tissues and bags of Ricola cough drops...is 10am too early to start putting whiskey in my tea?  After a few hours of Dr Who episodes on Netflix and an equal amount of time sucked into the time vortex that is Pinterest, I remembered this blog.  Only one semi-good thing about having a cold...I can do these things without feeling (too) guilty.  Oh, and another good thing...I can ask my husband to go out grocery shopping and he will actually do it, no questions asked (OK, well a lot of questions asked...so far I've gotten 4 phone calls from the store..."they don't have fresh yams, are sweet potatoes ok?")...but at least I'm still here on the couch with my tissues and he's there with the yams...or sweet potatoes. 

So, in case you're wondering why I haven't written in so long, let me give you the Reader's Digest version (warning: contains obnoxious Mombrags about the kids):  We finished the girl child's gymnastics competition season with her placing 2nd All Around in the State competition (and medaling in all 4 events).  The boy child had a successful Spring, Summer, and Fall baseball season pitching and playing 1st base--even hitting his first ever over the fence homerun at their big summer tournament at Rehoboth Beach, DE.  I had a very successful garden and canned about 20 quarts of tomatoes and countless pints of pickled hot peppers.  Can you say homemade chili and salsa!?  Wonder if, when the zombie apocalypse happens, I can ward them off with hot peppers?  "Braaaaaaaainssss....oh no, get back she has habeneros....!"  Then there was a wonderful mojito and hottub filled week in the remote 4 X 4 section of the Outer Banks with some of the most awesome friends you can imagine (we'll skip the part where the Jeep broke down in the pouring rain and lightening storm and we had to navigate over flooded out dunes 4 X 4ing in said broken-down overheating Jeep at 1am...true story!).   And that pretty much sums up my last several months.  You can see why I haven't been around much. 

And now, in my cold medicine induced haze, my teenage son (how the heck did that happen....wasn't he just watching Thomas the Tank Engine and riding his Big Wheel?) is sitting here with 3 of his besties who spent the night, watching Dr Who with me (he has such cool friends!).  The girl child is getting ready for gymnastics practice, and tomorrow will compete in her first meet of the new season as a Level 6 gymnast (maybe I can get a nose/sinus transplant by then!).  I'm so excited for her...I'm sure I'm more nervous than she is!  And I'm still planning my Thanksgiving menu (how did I ever do this before Pinterest???).  Should be planning my Black Friday itinerary (yes, I'm one of those crazy get up at 3am to stand in line in the cold for hours just to get the adrenaline rush of a good doorbuster bargain), but it seems like Black Friday has turned into "let's ruin all our employees Thanksgiving Day celebrations by starting on Thursday" Day.  Really retailers???  Shame on you all!!!  (said in my sternest Mom voice). 

Hopefully my next blog post won't be months away...with winter coming, I plan to be cooking up lots of good soups and what-not and promise to post some recipes (along with some pictures, maybe, if I can remember again how to do that!).  Promise I won't wait until my next cold...or alien abduction...or zombie attack...I have habeneros, I'm ready!

No, I wasn't abducted by aliens!

Sometimes I kinda wish I was abducted by aliens, but no that's not why I haven't updated this blog in quite some time.  Life has gotten quite busy, not that it isn't usually busy, but lately it's been quite busy.  I wonder if, when aliens abduct you, after all that probing and stuff, they let you just float in a spaceship room with nothing to do but, well, just float.  No sports practices to be running frantically to after working 8 hours with angry disgruntled people (patients and coworkers included.), no "WHAT'S FOR SUPPER WE'RE HUNGRY NOW", no piles of laundry that seem to have evolved to the point they're able to procreate just sitting there in the hamper, no taxes to be done, well you get the point.  Would TOTALLY be worth the probing. 

I'm always seeing people posting on facebook about how bored they are, nothing to do, etc.  I wish I had me a little bit of that.  Guess it's one of those "grass is always greener" types of things.  But I doubt I'll be complaining of boredom for a long time.  Right now, we're at the end of gymnastics competition season--the girl child is competing in the State championships 2 weekends from now.  I do have to say I love seeing her compete, but I will be glad when the season is over.  She will still have to be taxied to practice 4 nights/week, but at least she won't be having meets on weekends.  But don't for a minute think our weekends will be ours again...noooooo, because the boy child's baseball season is just beginning.  Games twice/week, practices once/week, and weekend tournaments sprinkled into the pot several times/month.  No, weekends free are things of the past. 

And because I'm not busy enough already and want the added stress of having complete strangers scrutinize my past umpteen years of financial records (which I had to dig up out of my files aka boxes in my cellar), we're refinancing our home.  You can only go on seeing 3 point something percent interest rates for so long before you bite the bullet and trade that 7 point something one in.  Only it was more difficult than it was years ago when we did it.  Seems banks don't want to finance custom non-cookie cutter log homes and appraisers can't find anything even remotely comparable to our home sweet home in order to tell the bank how much to loan us.  Never mind that we both have mid to high 700's credit scores, pay our mortgage on time and always have done so, and have been in our current jobs for close to 10 years and have very stable work histories.  Also never mind that the refi will lower our years (changing from 30 to 15) AND will even lower our monthly payment in the process.  The way I see it is that should be LESS risk to the bank.  But I know I'm just being logical and logic is sometimes (usually?) NOT how the rest of the world works.  Especially the financial world (won't even get into talking about taxes!)

Maybe if I sign over my 2 kids to them?  Let the banks cart them around to practices.  Aliens, where are you????

Another opportunity to support local businesses and get healthy (and embarrass your children!) in the process

Almost all of my adult life I've belonged to a gym.  I mostly gravitate to your basic sweats and t-shirt type gyms.  I've never been one for snooty upscale places where people prance around in spandex looking like Barbie and Ken posers.  Those of you who know me know I'm not, ahem, built for spandex.  That would be pretty scary.  So, when I moved back to my hometown about 10 years ago I searched for a new gym, finally settling on Twin Valley YMCA, which was just actually opening up.  And in the years to follow, I enjoyed many of their group classes, cardio machines, and weights.  The staff was always friendly and as a bonus they had free babysitting.  This all came to a screeching halt last October when they announced they were closing...now what???

So in the months that followed, I checked out numerous other gyms, not finding what I was looking for.  And then I saw something on a friend's facebook announcing the upcoming opening of a new gym, Twin Valley Family Fitness, that was taking over the space formerly occupied by the Y.  OK, I'll give it a whirl.  Well, it has been everything the Y was, and then some...a LOT some!  The first thing that really impressed me was their family friendly atmosphere. Yes, there is still free babysitting, but now children 8 and older are welcome to use the cardio equipment and take group classes with a parent.  How better to encourage a healthy lifestyle from early on!  Now, I know this might not appeal to some people, but maybe these people are better off at the spandex-laden places.  I now get to exercise side by side with my kids, feeling comfortable in my t-shirt and sweats, embarrassing the heck out of my daughter with my lame attempts to shake it in zumba.  HA!  I'm sure when she's 40-something, she'll have a blast embarrassing her own kids!

And to say that they are community-minded is a bit of an understatement.  They are constantly promoting local businesses and sponsoring programs at the local school and at other places in the area.  My absolute favorite thing is that they have started allowing members to get deliveries from The Doorstep Dairy.  Anyone my age remember the milkman from your childhood???  That is exactly what the Doorstep Dairy is, and then some. I had looked into this service when it first started a few years ago, but unfortunately I live out in the middle of nowhere, and while it's nice to not have to worry about pesky neighbors seeing me in my pj's walking my dog in the morning, we give up luxuries such as food delivered to our door. (My kids have NO CLUE what pizza delivery is!  They are always reminding me how deprived they are.  They'll probably need therapy for life.  Can you tell how sorry I feel for them?)

So anyway, now I can get my fresh from a local farm milk delivered (complete with glass bottles!) right to the gym!  They also have a plethora of other local products they deliver, from coffee, to cage free chicken eggs, to cheese, to fresh produce (and much, much more!).  And, because it's delivered to the gym, it assures that I get my lazy butt there to work out!  Win, win.

This is just one more example of local businesses working together to benefit not only themselves, but the community at large.  Thank You Twin Valley Family Fitness and Doorstep Dairy for helping me and my family live a more healthy lifestyle, not only by providing a family friendly, non-intimidating place to work out but also by giving me the opportunity to buy fresh, organic, local products year-round.  (while providing continued opportunities to embarrass my daughter with my sleek zumba moves!  BONUS!)  (Better start saving for that therapy, hehe!)

Support Your Local Farmers!

I've had a great day so far today.  Most of that is thanks to the satisfaction I am getting from supporting my local community, and by "local community" I really mean "local economy", and by "local economy" I mean spending a nice chunk of change at The Elverson Farmers' Market.  Now, you must understand I live in rural SouthEastern Pennsylvania.  The Farmers' Market concept is not a new thing here.  Many people across the country are just now getting on the "buy local" bandwagon, but for me and many of my neighbors, this has always been our way of life.  I can remember back to childhood stopping at various farmers' roadside stands for freshly picked produce.   As a kid, I didn't really care if it was pesticide free and organic.  I just knew that strawberries picked fresh off the plant tasted WAAAAAYYY better than the shriveled pathetic ones that came from God Knows Where at the grocery store.

 I also spent most of my childhood hanging out on my grandparents' farm.  I never had any preconceived ideas of where my meat came from.  I knew it didn't just drop from the sky into the meat section of the store.  We raised the animals we ate.  Everyone took part in the butchering process, even the kids.  (yeah, I know some of you are thinking ewwww gross, but if you eat meat, that's the reality, someone's gotta do it).  Again, we didn't care that the cows we ate lived lives wandering happily through fields chomping on grass, hormone and antibiotic free.  We just knew that those steaks were the juiciest most flavorful things on earth. 

But now, I no longer have my grandparents' farm to satisfy my cravings for a big slab o' cow.  Change that to a big slab o' hormone and antibiotic free cow.  Because now that I'm not a kid, I do care about those things.  As someone who has worked in the medical field for over 20 years, and also as someone who is a breast cancer survivor, I am convinced that the pesticides, the hormones, and the antibiotics we pump into our foods are related to so many illnesses such as cancer and antibiotic-resistant bacterial infections. And the kid in me still relishes the freshness and the flavor of not only locally raised meat, but produce as well.

So that is why I love our local farmers' market.  Now this time of year in Pennsylvania it's not full with the ripe treasures we see in the summer (I am so jealous of my California friends who have fresh, local produce year round!), but it does have hormone and antibiotic free beef and cage free chicken eggs from Lone Star Farms, artisan raw milk cheeses and spreads from Conebella Farms, fresh apple cider and raw honey from Weaver's Orchard, homemade jams and (my favorite!) Argentine Chimichurri from Old Mill Gourmet, and fresh roasted coffee from Twin Valley Coffee. 

I realize a lot of you reading this do not live close enough to enjoy this particular farmers' market.  If you do, check them out!  The website link is above and they also have a newsletter and a facebook page.  If not, make it a point to find out where you can get fresh, local products.  And those of you who know me know I'm all about bargains and cheap--well, you might be surprised to know that without having to pay to transport your food from hundreds and hundreds of miles away (don't even get me started on how much gas this takes and how much pollution is created!), the cost of local products is often less than similar products from the grocery store!  Bonus!  The other, and perhaps most satisfying, perk of buying local products is that you support your community, keeping the local economy strong and helping family farmers stay in business.

But if you ask me, it just plain tastes better!

Freebies Annonymous meetings anyone?

OK, I'll admit it.  My name is Doreen and I am a Freebie and Bargain-aholic.  I can tell myself that I'm only going to pop on the internet briefly to check my email, but I'm really just deluding myself.  An hour later I'm still surfing the freebie and bargain sites, the emails long forgotten.  I rarely buy anything without looking online for a coupon or coupon code.  Total time suck, but totally worth it when I score an awesome deal (and don't even get me started on Black Friday...or Black Week or whatever they're calling it now that it starts on Thanksgiving night and extends well into the following week!).  Sometimes I feel like a need an intervention.  Like someone needs to just kid-nap me and drag me to Best Buy kicking and screaming and force me to pay full price on something right off their shelf--no hours of comparisons (searching via swagbucks, of course) no hunting down codes, no rebate forms--ugh, my hands are starting to shake just thinking about it. 

One of my all time favorite freebie sites is BZZAgent.  It's not technically a freebie site, rather a word-of-mouth advertising site that sends out free full-sized products in exchange for your "BZZ".  If you like the product, you spread the word and report back on the site about it.  As a bonus, each report you submit back earns points on MyPoints (another one of my favorites!), which you can cash in for gift cards and other cool things (see how addicting all this freebie/bargain stuff can be???)  In the few years that I've been a member, I've received things ranging from a Sonicare electric toothbrush to Lindt Lindor truffles to Green Mountain K-cups--all full sized products (or free coupons for the full-sized product).

My current BZZAgent "mission" is Dunkin' Donuts Iced Coffee (South Eastern PA friends, visit Dunkin' Philly's facebook site and like them!).  They really didn't have to twist my arm for this one.  I'm already a fan.  Love me my Dunkin' Coffee--hot, cold, whatever--bring it on!  Drinking iced coffee in the winter, though, is something I rarely do.  And I suppose that's the whole idea behind this offering--to pick up winter sales of a product that is normally thought of as being a summer drink.  Brilliant!  Again, I'm a sucker for free, so if I have free iced coffee coupons in the winter, well, you better believe they're going to be used!  And I have to admit, the concept works.  While hot coffee warms me on cold winter days, the iced coffee was just the pick-me-up I needed one afternoon when I was really dragging.  Plus, Dunkin' will also throw in a shot of a multitude of flavors (unfortunately Godiva Chocolate Liquor was not on their menu, BUT there was a mocha option which was quite tasty!).

So now I find myself considering Dunkin' Iced Coffee in the winter.  With my free coupons.  On my way to my Freebies Annonymous meeting.  Anyone care to join me?  (is that kinda like an alcoholic stopping off at the bar for a quick beer on the way to AA?)  Nevermind, I'm not ready to quit yet.  If you know of any great freebie/bargain/point/rebate/coupon sites, feel free to share below!!!!!!!!!!